Can someone with serial console access try NixOS kernel on Librem 5?

[dos]

…or you could just use the USB-C port:

Debubo - easy access to Librem 5 serial console over USB-C

I have recently designed a STM32G071CB-based board that, when paired with right TPS65982 config, can provide access to Librem 5’s UART2 serial over its USB-C port in a plug-and-play manner while still allowing to use the phone’s USB-C port for power and USB 2.0 data. [Debubo]

…or you could use the extension connector:

Librem5 / Ext Con Breakout Board · GitLab

This one is even available to buy from Purism:

Librem 5 Rigid-Flex Breakout Board – Purism

[edit] I missed the implied non-seriousness of your post, but I’ll leave these links here in case other people find them useful